“Don’t be worried, it’s alright, nothing happened”

This is Mariam here! Anis and I thought it would be a good idea to include some input about what goes on at home while he is away at work. So here I am, giving you a bird’s eye view into what goes on at home, while Anis is at work for 9 hours.

We skeptically started Mummy on a new medication a few weeks back, thinking it might help her depression/fits of anger. I say skeptically because, since the diagnosis, we have tried every memory pill, every vitamin, every pain killer, and every medication that experts have told us might help. We’ve tried allopathic as well as homeopathic treatments, conventional as well as non-conventional treatments. All to no avail. Same fits of anger, depression, sadness, confusion, and loss of bearings. So when we heard of another pill, we were doubtful that it might work, yet at the same time, still holding out hope that this might do the trick. (Note: even though we know that there is no cure, hope sometimes gets the better of us, and we still think we have a chance).

To our surprise, this medication worked! Her depression/anger are almost completely non-existent at this point. As Anis has been writing, she has been in an uplifted mood for weeks now. Mummy has been laughing a lot more, a lot more cheerful, and generally in a more positive frame of mind since this medication has started. Caring for her in this state is MUCH easier, than trying to care for her when she was angry/agitated/depressed.

But as with everything, there are two sides to this coin. On the one side, we have Mummy happy, laughing, and cheerful. On the flip side, we have a messed up sleep cycle, leading to grogginess during the day, and being wide awake at night, when everyone else is sleeping. I’m not sure if the medicine causes change in sleep patterns, but that’s what’s been happening the past few weeks. Sleepy and groggy during the day, wide awake by night. And by wide awake, I mean she wants to go for long drives at 9 PM (which is great! Because it shows less signs of her previous agoraphobia). But it leads her to want to talk/go to the bathroom/eat all into the wee hours of the night.

For Papa especially, this has been extremely tough. Just the other night, Anis and heard a noise from their room. He jumped up and ran to go see what it was. Mummy wanted to go to the bathroom, but her bedroom door was slightly closed, and she didn’t understand how to open the door, so she kept walking into the door.

During the day, she is extremely unsteady on her feet and wobbly, especially after having woken up from a nap to go use the restroom. Two days ago, Anis was home, and she was walking back to her room from the bathroom, when all of a sudden we hear her a *thud* and then her yelling for Papa to come. We all ran to her room, to find her on the floor, confused, scared, slightly hurt. She was trying to climb onto her bed, when she got confused, and toppled onto the floor. This was a first.

When we got her onto her bed, all of us were in shock. This had never happened before, and it signaled a new downward spiral that we had to deal with. Mummy herself was shocked, but tried to cover it up by trying to console Anis and Papa, who both looked like a deer in headlights.

“Don’t be worried, it’s alright, nothing happened,” she said.

But even she couldn’t hide the shocked look on her own face, as she was trying to process and digest the fact that she could no longer be left alone to do a simple task as climb into her bed. That she completely lost her bearings. That this had never happened to her before. That this was now happening to her.

“Don’t be worried, it’s alright, nothing happened,” she said.

I think as much as those words were trying to console Anis and Papa, she said those words to try to console herself as well……..

  1. #1 by KUMAR ANSHUMAN on August 17, 2011 - 6:36 am

    this is Bullu here. Nuzhat aunty has been closest friend of mummy(Lalitanshumayee). Down the memory lane I recall how we celebrated festivals together with Punnu and Anis. Anis was kid then. My father liked grilled mutton prepared by aunty so do I. She cooked so well. I just loved the dry sewainyan she used to cook on ID.
    Soft spoken and ever smiling… Nuzhat aunty’s image is still fresh in my mind. I still remember the house in Sultanganj and the garden in front of it where we used to spend time and play.
    It is sad to hear she’s struggling at this moment. I’m proud of Anis and Mariam for taking care of their mother like a child. Gos bless you dears. You are so fortunate to have your parents with you.

  2. #2 by iqbals on August 21, 2011 - 3:11 pm

    Maybe you guys should try cupping. As long as she lets you do it to her without getting upset at the sight of the razor blade or freaked out by seeing all the blood. It has worked wonders for my freinds and me.

    According to a hadeeth narrated by Jaabir (may Allaah be pleased with him), the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there is any good in your medical treatments, it is in the knife of the cupper, drinking honey, or cauterization with fire, as appropriate to the cause of the illness, but I would not like to be cauterized.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 10/139)

    According to a hadeeth narrated by Anas ibn Maalik, may Allaah be pleased with him, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I did not pass by any group on the night when I was taken on the Night Journey (Isra’), but they said to me, ‘O Muhammad, tell your ummah to do cupping.’” (Reported by Ibn Maajah; it has corroborating evidence which strengthens it).

    It was reported from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best times to be treated with cupping are the seventeenth, nineteenth or twenty-first [of the month].” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2054; the isnaad is da’eef).

    Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever is treated with cupping on the seventeenth, nineteenth or twenty first, will be healed from all diseases.” (Reported by Abu Dawood, 3861, and al-Bayhaqi, 9/340. The isnad is hasan).

    • #3 by Mariam on August 21, 2011 - 3:28 pm

      Cupping would be too painful for her. Her tolerance for pain is extremely low. Sometimes if we just hold her arm firmly to keep her steady she says it causes her pain. Cupping might benefit her, but getting her to do cupping would be a challenge. The blood, pain, etc… She wouldn’t be able to tolerate it. So far, the medications that she is being given right now are helping to “manage” it, but obviously not cure it.

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